I sit here tonight avoiding balancing my check book and looking at my bills, it will only depress me. So what do I do I watch a lifetime network movie??? That makes sense right? I get caught on these things b/c I will see a famous actress and think oh it can't be that bad. I saw Kirstin Dunst in one movie called 15 and Pregnant and I think I stayed up til 1am watching this cheesetackular movie. Well tonight I am watching Gracie's Choice b/c Kristen Bell is in it. (So is Anne Heche but I figure Lifetime movies are whats next for her-sorry to be mean)
Its about a woman (Anne) and her 5 children with 5 baby daddy's. Her eldest, Gracie (Kristen), who winds up taking care of her half siblings taking parental custody from her mom. So in the course of Gracie's life she bounces around a lot and is just over looked everywhere. I know this is for dramatic effect well it worked.
I was watching her interaction with these counselors and I have been trying to think about what I want to do when I grow up and I think I have decided some form of counselor is it. I want to help people, I have been told that I can look at things objectively (I realize this only happens when I look at something that is not about me!) and people talk to me. I have found that I am the person who keeps being told things.
I am not complaining about this its just odd sometimes. When this woman at work pulls me aside to complain about our boss which I don't do b/c I like him and was odd b/c she is new and we don't talk. So now I have this information and I want fix it, you know talk to the boss man about it because there appears to be a huge problem with this particular co-worker and my question is does anyone else know? Shouldn't this be fixed. Yes I am a fixer.
So I think I want to go back to school for my masters in a form of counseling. I don't know if that will by guidance b/c I don't really want to deal with all the drama of schools but I would like to help. Maybe I figure it out in school. Now to figure out how to get paid for this school b/c otherwise I cannot afford it. And to figure out if I can even take classes, with the monster my time is precious. I have been thinking about this for a while and now I am thinking about waiting until he is a bit older and can be home on his own. But now that I know what I want I don't want to wait. Oh the issues and it all came out of a ridiculous movie. Awesome right?
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Break time at work
So I was taking a little break at work today getting my fill on the interweb and what do I come across but this article:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28269290/?gt1=43001
It was on the MSN homepage. This family from NJ has named their son Adolf Hitler b/c the name is unique. WTF? Ok so I am reading this article and the dad is trying to defend his actions by saying he likes the name and wanted his son to have a unique name. He is upset b/c a store wouldn't spell out his son's name on a birthday cake, these people had to go to PA to a Wal-Mart before getting it done. I may be able to excuse this lapse in judgement had the article not said they have also wanted to have a swaticka on a cake before and had their other kids names not been... wait for it...JoyceLynn Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie what is this about???
Oh but dad said if his children grow up to hang out with other races he will be fine with that? Really???
This is why there is hate out there in this world!!! Are you kidding me? I mean come on now!! Hate is a learned thing and I bet these children are being taught things at home that other parents aren't going to like. I remember a young girl calling my son the N word, I was so pissed b/c I had to explain to him that that is a bad bad word and then try to figure out how to deal with this child and her grandmother. This girl was 6 at the time! You know she picked that up at home. The worst part about that was it happened at a friends wedding and I didn't want to cause a scene but how else do you handle that???
So all in all why is this still going on? I know that everyone is entitled to their own opinions but can't they try to see things from other perspectives?
Now back to the grind stone.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28269290/?gt1=43001
It was on the MSN homepage. This family from NJ has named their son Adolf Hitler b/c the name is unique. WTF? Ok so I am reading this article and the dad is trying to defend his actions by saying he likes the name and wanted his son to have a unique name. He is upset b/c a store wouldn't spell out his son's name on a birthday cake, these people had to go to PA to a Wal-Mart before getting it done. I may be able to excuse this lapse in judgement had the article not said they have also wanted to have a swaticka on a cake before and had their other kids names not been... wait for it...JoyceLynn Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie what is this about???
Oh but dad said if his children grow up to hang out with other races he will be fine with that? Really???
This is why there is hate out there in this world!!! Are you kidding me? I mean come on now!! Hate is a learned thing and I bet these children are being taught things at home that other parents aren't going to like. I remember a young girl calling my son the N word, I was so pissed b/c I had to explain to him that that is a bad bad word and then try to figure out how to deal with this child and her grandmother. This girl was 6 at the time! You know she picked that up at home. The worst part about that was it happened at a friends wedding and I didn't want to cause a scene but how else do you handle that???
So all in all why is this still going on? I know that everyone is entitled to their own opinions but can't they try to see things from other perspectives?
Now back to the grind stone.
Friday, November 28, 2008
This is just wrong
http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20243367,00.html
I spent of the day in the house tonight. We went to the mall to get a gift for my mom and to the movies but nothing big and it wasn't a big mess. I come home and decide to check the headlines how fucked up has this world become when 200 people trample a wal-mart employee to death as he was opening the doors for the 5am sale. This article also says that people didn't stop rushing into the store until police put tape up in front of the door. What is wrong with people???
I am so upset by this I had to share. Where is the holiday spirit? I mean is it really getting the hottest item or the cheapest? I thought it was giving someone something you know they will like. I happen to love this time of year but not b/c of the gifts I receive but b/c of the ones I give and the decorations. I want to go see Miracle on 34th street in Baltimore, for those in the area who haven't been I recommend it, its a couple of blocks in Baltimore that each house on the street decorate and not just a little but to the hills. It's so pretty.
As I type this there is a commercial for Christmas movies/specials which is another thing I love about this time of year that I thought I should share.
Well I am done now that I have shared my outrage in this world!!!
I spent of the day in the house tonight. We went to the mall to get a gift for my mom and to the movies but nothing big and it wasn't a big mess. I come home and decide to check the headlines how fucked up has this world become when 200 people trample a wal-mart employee to death as he was opening the doors for the 5am sale. This article also says that people didn't stop rushing into the store until police put tape up in front of the door. What is wrong with people???
I am so upset by this I had to share. Where is the holiday spirit? I mean is it really getting the hottest item or the cheapest? I thought it was giving someone something you know they will like. I happen to love this time of year but not b/c of the gifts I receive but b/c of the ones I give and the decorations. I want to go see Miracle on 34th street in Baltimore, for those in the area who haven't been I recommend it, its a couple of blocks in Baltimore that each house on the street decorate and not just a little but to the hills. It's so pretty.
As I type this there is a commercial for Christmas movies/specials which is another thing I love about this time of year that I thought I should share.
Well I am done now that I have shared my outrage in this world!!!
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Happy Thanksgiving to all!!!
Thanksgiving 2008
Its not even noon yet and I already have my first wound. I got a call on Tuesday asking if I could make a chicken dish for the ex laws that I used to make when I was married. I cant say no to anyone so of course I said yes.
Well I am working on this dish which takes too much time which is why I don't make it very often. I had just read my friends blog about her oven going up in smoke so when I started to hear noises from my oven I was thinking oh shit I have to turn it off and head out to the ex laws now to cook. Blah.
Then I remembered there was a skillet thing in the oven so I looked and that was what the noises were from, awesome!!! I pull out the skillet with one hand a potato and knife in the other and my child no where to be found b/c I needed someplace to put this pan. The stove was and still is covered in the pots I need to cook this dish. I yell for the child who has disappeared into the bathroom (as of late this has been a regular occurrence, this will have to be saved for another blog) so the kid is no help. Fine I get that all situated and go back to peeling and cutting potatoes.
It comes time to wash a potato and what does my dumb ass do???? I burned my arm-my war wound! So I yelped b/c it hurt, the kid calls back, "now what?" Oh hell no child where do you get off saying now what? He has been playing with his figures and complaining that I won't let him turn off the parade, damn it this is going to be our tradition if I have to drag him into it kicking and screaming!!!
So I have my first war wound, in a couple of hours we will be off the ex laws, lets see if anything else fun happens while I am there and an updated post will be needed, cross your fingers for not!!
Happy Thanksgiving!!!
Its not even noon yet and I already have my first wound. I got a call on Tuesday asking if I could make a chicken dish for the ex laws that I used to make when I was married. I cant say no to anyone so of course I said yes.
Well I am working on this dish which takes too much time which is why I don't make it very often. I had just read my friends blog about her oven going up in smoke so when I started to hear noises from my oven I was thinking oh shit I have to turn it off and head out to the ex laws now to cook. Blah.
Then I remembered there was a skillet thing in the oven so I looked and that was what the noises were from, awesome!!! I pull out the skillet with one hand a potato and knife in the other and my child no where to be found b/c I needed someplace to put this pan. The stove was and still is covered in the pots I need to cook this dish. I yell for the child who has disappeared into the bathroom (as of late this has been a regular occurrence, this will have to be saved for another blog) so the kid is no help. Fine I get that all situated and go back to peeling and cutting potatoes.
It comes time to wash a potato and what does my dumb ass do???? I burned my arm-my war wound! So I yelped b/c it hurt, the kid calls back, "now what?" Oh hell no child where do you get off saying now what? He has been playing with his figures and complaining that I won't let him turn off the parade, damn it this is going to be our tradition if I have to drag him into it kicking and screaming!!!
So I have my first war wound, in a couple of hours we will be off the ex laws, lets see if anything else fun happens while I am there and an updated post will be needed, cross your fingers for not!!
Happy Thanksgiving!!!
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Wedding drama
Ok so I was in a wedding this past weekend and there was tons of drama and it's still going on and I want to scream! So I am going to blog about everything and let it all out...
When the bride got engaged her cousin appointed herself maid of honor. Ok that can be over looked if she was a good maid of honor but she is where all the drama started so here is what she did or didn't do:
1. MOH lives a couple of states away so she had to come down to the wedding location. But she doesn't have a car so she was going to take the train with her 2 daughters and mother on Wed but couldn't b/c of a work obigation. This is no biggie and well annoying at the last minute something that can be gotten over. So she was to be down no later than 8 pm on Thursday but decided at the last minute that this was too expensive and she wanted to take the grey hound bus in which case she wouldn't be down here until 2 am Friday morning and would need to be picked up in the heart of DC???!!!!???? are you kidding me??? well then she decided that wasn't going to work for whatever reason so she would come in at 10:30 am the day before the wedding and still need to be picked up. I have no idea what time she finally got into the state but the bride didn't pick her up the brides grammy did so the MOH didn't get down to the bride until 2:20-3pm. This day was supposed to be spent getting little things done in the AM and getting mani/pedi's in the afternoon. She missed all of this b/c she can't driver herself down.
2. The bride was so laid back about the dresses. She told us at the beginning of the year she wanted us in black, she didn't care what type of dress as long as it was black. No problem, that is so great, my dress cost $19.99 awesome!!! Well the MOH had her daughters in the wedding as jr. bridesmaids. Instead of spending the 10 months before the wedding finding a dress that would work she waited until the last minute and had her mother make the girls dresses. She told the bride the dresses would have a white jacket over them but would be all black. Well she lied!!!! The dresses had a white top and a black skirt bottom b/c the girls needed a black and white dress for band. When the bride gets mad b/c this is not what she wanted the MOH gets mad at the bride and tells her she is being a bridezilla. So the bride decides she wants to buy the girls dresses but the MOH tells her it would kill her mother if the girls don't wear her home made dresses. My response to that was that the girls would wear those to band things but the wedding dress was supposed to be all black. Get over yourself.
3. My pet peeve is that the MOH did nothing with her hair nor did she wear any make up that I could tell. She was in a wedding she should have done something.
4. And finally the date came onto and kissed my date!!!! Yes I told her he was my friend however he was still there with me!!! It is not my fault she had no date and she had no right to kiss my date. I know he is not completely blameless and I did speak to him about this but still I am so mad at her for her whorishness!!!
So after all of this I have kept my mouth shut. I did not say anything to the whore of a MOH for kissing my date and why b/c it was the brides day and drama needed to stay out of it. I tried very hard to keep the children in line so neither the bride nor groom would have to deal with it. I tried she on the other had did all she could to disrupt everything and now, now the bride's grandmother is guilting her telling her that the day shouldn't have been all about the bride and she owes the MOH an apology. Like hell she does!! The MOH was all in the wrong and is only mad that she has no man herself and maybe if she didn't try to sleep with anything with a willy then she would have a man. Oh and maybe if she could get her stuff together and move out on her own instead of living with her mother! That may help. I think she wants a man to come in and take care of her and you know what I don't know if there are too many men out there that want to deal with all of that. She needs to grow up and get her own life.
As for the rest of the brides family, why are they all snowed by the MOH??? How is she the victim in all of this? She didn't do anything she was supposed to do and could not be counted on. Oh yes and she was supposed to bring a card for the digital camera and didn't do I did the day of the wedding. I had to buy it b/c she couldn't be bothered to help. I am so happy she lives so far away b/c if I never see her again it will be too late.
I am sorry bridie but I think you need to write off the majority of your family. MOH is selfish and everyone else falls for her b.s. If they can't be supportive they can walk away. MOH is not innocent in all of this and doesn't deserve a free pass b/c she was drinking, she shouldn't drink if she cannot behave herself-plain and simple.
When the bride got engaged her cousin appointed herself maid of honor. Ok that can be over looked if she was a good maid of honor but she is where all the drama started so here is what she did or didn't do:
1. MOH lives a couple of states away so she had to come down to the wedding location. But she doesn't have a car so she was going to take the train with her 2 daughters and mother on Wed but couldn't b/c of a work obigation. This is no biggie and well annoying at the last minute something that can be gotten over. So she was to be down no later than 8 pm on Thursday but decided at the last minute that this was too expensive and she wanted to take the grey hound bus in which case she wouldn't be down here until 2 am Friday morning and would need to be picked up in the heart of DC???!!!!???? are you kidding me??? well then she decided that wasn't going to work for whatever reason so she would come in at 10:30 am the day before the wedding and still need to be picked up. I have no idea what time she finally got into the state but the bride didn't pick her up the brides grammy did so the MOH didn't get down to the bride until 2:20-3pm. This day was supposed to be spent getting little things done in the AM and getting mani/pedi's in the afternoon. She missed all of this b/c she can't driver herself down.
2. The bride was so laid back about the dresses. She told us at the beginning of the year she wanted us in black, she didn't care what type of dress as long as it was black. No problem, that is so great, my dress cost $19.99 awesome!!! Well the MOH had her daughters in the wedding as jr. bridesmaids. Instead of spending the 10 months before the wedding finding a dress that would work she waited until the last minute and had her mother make the girls dresses. She told the bride the dresses would have a white jacket over them but would be all black. Well she lied!!!! The dresses had a white top and a black skirt bottom b/c the girls needed a black and white dress for band. When the bride gets mad b/c this is not what she wanted the MOH gets mad at the bride and tells her she is being a bridezilla. So the bride decides she wants to buy the girls dresses but the MOH tells her it would kill her mother if the girls don't wear her home made dresses. My response to that was that the girls would wear those to band things but the wedding dress was supposed to be all black. Get over yourself.
3. My pet peeve is that the MOH did nothing with her hair nor did she wear any make up that I could tell. She was in a wedding she should have done something.
4. And finally the date came onto and kissed my date!!!! Yes I told her he was my friend however he was still there with me!!! It is not my fault she had no date and she had no right to kiss my date. I know he is not completely blameless and I did speak to him about this but still I am so mad at her for her whorishness!!!
So after all of this I have kept my mouth shut. I did not say anything to the whore of a MOH for kissing my date and why b/c it was the brides day and drama needed to stay out of it. I tried very hard to keep the children in line so neither the bride nor groom would have to deal with it. I tried she on the other had did all she could to disrupt everything and now, now the bride's grandmother is guilting her telling her that the day shouldn't have been all about the bride and she owes the MOH an apology. Like hell she does!! The MOH was all in the wrong and is only mad that she has no man herself and maybe if she didn't try to sleep with anything with a willy then she would have a man. Oh and maybe if she could get her stuff together and move out on her own instead of living with her mother! That may help. I think she wants a man to come in and take care of her and you know what I don't know if there are too many men out there that want to deal with all of that. She needs to grow up and get her own life.
As for the rest of the brides family, why are they all snowed by the MOH??? How is she the victim in all of this? She didn't do anything she was supposed to do and could not be counted on. Oh yes and she was supposed to bring a card for the digital camera and didn't do I did the day of the wedding. I had to buy it b/c she couldn't be bothered to help. I am so happy she lives so far away b/c if I never see her again it will be too late.
I am sorry bridie but I think you need to write off the majority of your family. MOH is selfish and everyone else falls for her b.s. If they can't be supportive they can walk away. MOH is not innocent in all of this and doesn't deserve a free pass b/c she was drinking, she shouldn't drink if she cannot behave herself-plain and simple.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
My Weakness
I have this friend and he is my weakness. I have known this man since I was in 8th grade so thats what since I was 12 or 13 so basically half my life. We tried dating in high school, it didn't last long maybe a couple of months but a great friendship came out of this that has remained. In fact my ex-husband didn't like my friendship with this man b/c I talked often of the things we would do and my ex was jealous.
We 2 years ago we had the brilliant idea that we could be friends with benefits. That was a mistake and ended with us not talking for about 8-9 months. Well we started talking again and have since resumed our friendship with benefits. You would think I had learned from the first time but this time I thought I could handle things b/c the last time we were going out every weekend and winding up together but this time it was a once in a while thing. And our friendship seemed to be the center of our relationship not the benefits, in fact I have been dating other trying to find someone (side note: no benefits for the others yet).
Well then I decided to take him to a wedding with me. What was I thinking, taking this odd relationship more main stream, he was all for it and excited to come with me and the monster. I let him know that I was in the wedding so it would be a lot of alone time and yet he was really willing to come. Awesome. I got my hopes up that this would be a great weekend with him.
The night before the wedding we all go out (the bride, the date, me and the maid of honor). Throughout the day the MOH is kind of working my date, I had warned him about her as she is slightly whorish!!!! You know coming down for the weekend and ending up going home each night with a different guy and what not.
Needless to say I was not pleased when on the way home they are kissing in the back seat of my car!!! First we will start with him and the fact that I told him she would try and I would like him to stay clear. When he met her his reaction was eewww!!! ok if he really thought that then why would he then kiss her but whatever. So moving onto her what kind of person goes after a man brought to a wedding with someone else? I mean come on now woman have some self respect.
So the bride was mad too but didn't say much until the reception when she felt she had calmed down and could talk about it. You know what the MOH's response was??? I can't control myself after a couple of drinks??? what kind of excuse is that? I mean grow up you are a 35 year old woman. Learn some manners, respect for others and respect for yourself. I will refrain at this point from being any harsher b/c that would make this post too long and not nice.
Moving back to date/weakness. So we get back to where we are staying and he can tell I am mad. But in actuality I am mad at myself b/c he has done something like this to me before and I got my hopes up just to be dashed again by the same man.
So I finally lay it out for him. He tells me I don't communicate. Well neither does he! So what is the point in my bringing it up. I go through it all in my head on a regular basis. I know what I want and I pretty sure I know what he wants and that doesn't jive at all. Which blows b/c we click and we always have fun and things are always smooth sailing. I have been out there dating as of late and I just don't get the same feeling from the guys I have been with that I do from him. I told him this. B/c I am annoyed I believe I said: "it's frustrating that the guy who I can't be in a relationship with I have feelings for but those who I could be nothing."
In our conversation I just told him "its whatever" to which he replies "your not whatever to me" and he also tells me that I am the one that is always there and always will be there. Fine then stop treating me like whatever. Oh yes and he loves me. Really how do you love me? He can't answer that! So don't say it if you can't back it up. I love you is big statement that could change everything and it can destroy everything too. I am not naive about this but I do want some sort of clarity and he has the nerve to tell me I don't communicate! At least what I say makes sense! Goodness me! I think he was just trying to not piss me off, but it back fired b/c you don't throw that statement out there if you don't mean it! That is just plain cruel.
I am frustrated by our relationship but do not know how to change it. I ask him where does this leave us and he goes into his speech about how we aren't ready to be in a relationship and all I can think of is no dumbass what you are saying but not b/c you have no balls is that you don't want to be in a relationship with me. Just say it, rip the band aid off, let it go. So I think in the course of this rant I have decided I am done with this game. We can be friends there will be no more benefits! I am done being a doormat. I am annoyed as hell that I have feelings for him but it could be one of the psychological things where I have these feelings b/c I don't have him and when I have him I won't want him.
Here are the logical reasons why we cannot be in a relationship:
1. I have a child which means I am not able to go out every weekend and I am responsible when I do the next morning.
2. I have more limits than he does.
3. He has a wandering soul, I cannot wander as I have a child I need to be stable for. I think it would be a shame to hold him back when he wants to go and I can't go with him.
So my head knows it won't work why do I still want him??? I don't know but I am going to try and stay strong and continue our friendship and friendship alone.
We 2 years ago we had the brilliant idea that we could be friends with benefits. That was a mistake and ended with us not talking for about 8-9 months. Well we started talking again and have since resumed our friendship with benefits. You would think I had learned from the first time but this time I thought I could handle things b/c the last time we were going out every weekend and winding up together but this time it was a once in a while thing. And our friendship seemed to be the center of our relationship not the benefits, in fact I have been dating other trying to find someone (side note: no benefits for the others yet).
Well then I decided to take him to a wedding with me. What was I thinking, taking this odd relationship more main stream, he was all for it and excited to come with me and the monster. I let him know that I was in the wedding so it would be a lot of alone time and yet he was really willing to come. Awesome. I got my hopes up that this would be a great weekend with him.
The night before the wedding we all go out (the bride, the date, me and the maid of honor). Throughout the day the MOH is kind of working my date, I had warned him about her as she is slightly whorish!!!! You know coming down for the weekend and ending up going home each night with a different guy and what not.
Needless to say I was not pleased when on the way home they are kissing in the back seat of my car!!! First we will start with him and the fact that I told him she would try and I would like him to stay clear. When he met her his reaction was eewww!!! ok if he really thought that then why would he then kiss her but whatever. So moving onto her what kind of person goes after a man brought to a wedding with someone else? I mean come on now woman have some self respect.
So the bride was mad too but didn't say much until the reception when she felt she had calmed down and could talk about it. You know what the MOH's response was??? I can't control myself after a couple of drinks??? what kind of excuse is that? I mean grow up you are a 35 year old woman. Learn some manners, respect for others and respect for yourself. I will refrain at this point from being any harsher b/c that would make this post too long and not nice.
Moving back to date/weakness. So we get back to where we are staying and he can tell I am mad. But in actuality I am mad at myself b/c he has done something like this to me before and I got my hopes up just to be dashed again by the same man.
So I finally lay it out for him. He tells me I don't communicate. Well neither does he! So what is the point in my bringing it up. I go through it all in my head on a regular basis. I know what I want and I pretty sure I know what he wants and that doesn't jive at all. Which blows b/c we click and we always have fun and things are always smooth sailing. I have been out there dating as of late and I just don't get the same feeling from the guys I have been with that I do from him. I told him this. B/c I am annoyed I believe I said: "it's frustrating that the guy who I can't be in a relationship with I have feelings for but those who I could be nothing."
In our conversation I just told him "its whatever" to which he replies "your not whatever to me" and he also tells me that I am the one that is always there and always will be there. Fine then stop treating me like whatever. Oh yes and he loves me. Really how do you love me? He can't answer that! So don't say it if you can't back it up. I love you is big statement that could change everything and it can destroy everything too. I am not naive about this but I do want some sort of clarity and he has the nerve to tell me I don't communicate! At least what I say makes sense! Goodness me! I think he was just trying to not piss me off, but it back fired b/c you don't throw that statement out there if you don't mean it! That is just plain cruel.
I am frustrated by our relationship but do not know how to change it. I ask him where does this leave us and he goes into his speech about how we aren't ready to be in a relationship and all I can think of is no dumbass what you are saying but not b/c you have no balls is that you don't want to be in a relationship with me. Just say it, rip the band aid off, let it go. So I think in the course of this rant I have decided I am done with this game. We can be friends there will be no more benefits! I am done being a doormat. I am annoyed as hell that I have feelings for him but it could be one of the psychological things where I have these feelings b/c I don't have him and when I have him I won't want him.
Here are the logical reasons why we cannot be in a relationship:
1. I have a child which means I am not able to go out every weekend and I am responsible when I do the next morning.
2. I have more limits than he does.
3. He has a wandering soul, I cannot wander as I have a child I need to be stable for. I think it would be a shame to hold him back when he wants to go and I can't go with him.
So my head knows it won't work why do I still want him??? I don't know but I am going to try and stay strong and continue our friendship and friendship alone.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
How much can one person handle?
I am so stressed! So here is my list of stressers:
-money coupled with the economy is scaring the shit out of me (on the bright side I got my letter from child support, maybe I will start to see some relief or not who knows how this will play out)
-job I was given "promotion" that is really a lateral move with more work and responsibility but only $500 a year more money, not enough to see anything in my paycheck though. Which brings me more stress about money.
-dating so I have one guy who only wants one thing but says he wants more, one I have been dating casually but then mentioned moving in??? Really?? I had no idea we were there so Tuesday we are going to talk. I mean hell I have no idea what this man wants, yes it's my fault b/c I haven't asked but I also didn't think we were anything but casual. Holy crap man! More stress, can I unring this bell? What would it mean for the monster-who hasn't met this new guy? Am I going to be able to stand the back draft of a rash decision with my family? I mean they are supportive but I don't think they could or would support this, am I ready to walk away from them? Is this guy worth it? I DON'T KNOW = more stress. The last guy in my life we will call the stand in, we click so well and have such a good time together and the monster knows and likes him but I can't see it working, we are too different. Then again we have never tried so should we try? I really feel like it would just end badly.
-then my dang on washing machine broke. I always do my laundry on Sunday and now I can't finish it. Arg!!! I feel like its the last straw and all I want to do is lay down and cry for a day or at least get my stuff organized. ARG!!!
-money coupled with the economy is scaring the shit out of me (on the bright side I got my letter from child support, maybe I will start to see some relief or not who knows how this will play out)
-job I was given "promotion" that is really a lateral move with more work and responsibility but only $500 a year more money, not enough to see anything in my paycheck though. Which brings me more stress about money.
-dating so I have one guy who only wants one thing but says he wants more, one I have been dating casually but then mentioned moving in??? Really?? I had no idea we were there so Tuesday we are going to talk. I mean hell I have no idea what this man wants, yes it's my fault b/c I haven't asked but I also didn't think we were anything but casual. Holy crap man! More stress, can I unring this bell? What would it mean for the monster-who hasn't met this new guy? Am I going to be able to stand the back draft of a rash decision with my family? I mean they are supportive but I don't think they could or would support this, am I ready to walk away from them? Is this guy worth it? I DON'T KNOW = more stress. The last guy in my life we will call the stand in, we click so well and have such a good time together and the monster knows and likes him but I can't see it working, we are too different. Then again we have never tried so should we try? I really feel like it would just end badly.
-then my dang on washing machine broke. I always do my laundry on Sunday and now I can't finish it. Arg!!! I feel like its the last straw and all I want to do is lay down and cry for a day or at least get my stuff organized. ARG!!!
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